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The Very Important, and Very Essential, G Word

10/18/2015

26 Comments

 
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Ready or not, it’s that time of year again.

Yup, the craziness of the holiday season is about to make its advent, and yes, Halloween absolutely counts since we all know it’s the true marker for the beginning of the end-of-the-year sprint.

So, maybe, like a lot of folks I know (me included), you might be searching for a kick start way to feeling a little better about your life right now.

And believe it or not, there’s an easy way to do it. 

First, know that there’s no special equipment to buy, and that there isn’t a prescription in the mix either.  Neither will you have to memorize a mantra nor sign up for yoga classes.  There’s not even a special diet on the horizon. As a matter of fact, you won’t need any money at all.  Well, maybe one dollar. 

I’m talking about a gratitude journal.
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Here’s how it works.

Wait until the end of the day, after dinner and after those pesky errands, calls and chores are completed.  Then, right before settling down for the night, park yourself in a comfy spot, grab a piece of paper, or better yet, a small blank journal (here’s where a dollar store comes into play) and pencil or pen.  If at all possible, make sure it’s quiet, too. 
  
Now write down five things that happened that day that you’re grateful for. 

That’s it.

Don’t spend a lot of effort thinking about this daily list.  And, trust me: even in the midst of the utter lunacy of the season, it will be easy to come up with five things.

I know this for sure because I’ve kept this kind of diary, on and off, for nearly two decades, and through a whole lot of ups and downs. My only regret is that I often stop after a few months, and that it’s sometimes a few years before I start up again.

My lists are never very long, and yours needn’t be either.

I’ll put the date first, and then start right in.  Most times, my sentences are about occurrences that happen all of the time.  Things like my car starting right up, or a dog waking me with a big sloppy kiss on the cheek.  Being a confirmed foodie, I’ve also been known to scribble a few words about an amazing recipe I’ve found, or remember a great meal I savored earlier that day.  And sometimes, my gratitude is about stuff that doesn’t happen every day, such as a writing assignment falling into my lap, or finding an old friend on Facebook (especially a fellow clown) who I haven’t talked to in decades.      
 
Here’s the very best reason to keep a gratitude journal.  

It can, literally, change how you feel about yourself and about everything going on around you. 

Somehow—and you’ll need to ask someone else exactly how this works—it magically rewires your brain to make you more grateful for the life you have.

While this positivity doesn’t happen overnight, I’m usually feeling a whole lot lighter, and a whole lot better, about my place in the world less than two weeks after starting one of these diaries.

As it turns out, this is a pretty common consequence.

A quick Google search has an article titled The 31 Benefits of Gratitude You Didn’t Know About: How Gratitude Can Change Your Life.  The piece affirms that nurturing this sort of appreciation not only makes us happier, we also become healthier; our self-esteem increases, and yes, we’ll even want to exercise more. (Check out the entire piece, at http://happierhuman.com/benefits-of-gratitude/).

And while some folks are very good at just hearing about the upside of gratitude and then mindfully and purposefully putting its benefits into action, that has never worked for me. 

Instead, probably because I’m both a visual and kinesthetic learner, I actually need to be looking at something, and then, often writing that something down, before it sticks in my head.  That’s why my gratitude journal, which sits in plain sight on my coffee table, acts as a daily tool to kick the thankfulness gear into motion.

Looking over several pages from the past with the dates right there, it’s also gratifying to see one more thing.  

And that’s this: not only have I come through intact after a whole lot of not-so-terrific stuff life has thrown at me, I’ve always been able to find something, even the smallest thing, to appreciate during those times. 

And at the end of the tunnel, after the tears have dried, I’m usually smiling, too.  And grateful, always grateful.

How about you?  What are you grateful for, and how do you practice gratitude?  I look forward to your comments!
    
26 Comments
Jackie
10/18/2015 06:23:51 pm

Love keeping a gratitude journal. You really do learn to appreciate the little things that are so important to our total being. I also have a black covered journal in which to spew junk thoughts, just to get it out of my system. Then I shred it when finished.

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Hilary
10/18/2015 07:06:47 pm

I admire you for having the black covered journal. I think that if I were to read the kind of thoughts I'd put in mine, it would have the opposite effect that I'm going for. :)

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George
10/18/2015 06:31:12 pm

I start with gratitude. Life is a gift. Think about it. The very fact that we exist at all is a gift. Everything follows that, comes out of that, is a manifestation of that original gift. Many people are grateful to God for it, but even if one does not believe in God, it is undeniable that we have been given life from our mother. I am grateful to be alive, to wake up in the morning, to breathe, to have food to eat, to have family and friends and to live in this world that is so interesting and mysterious.

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Hilary
10/18/2015 07:07:22 pm

Amen to everything here! :)

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Janet link
10/18/2015 07:14:25 pm

Great idea! Another sweet idea to go along with this is to have a dream jar that you fill with your wants and needs. Then on New Years Eve you can open it up and see how many have come true.

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Hilary
10/18/2015 07:54:15 pm

Another great idea! :)

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Heather Risinger
10/18/2015 07:37:03 pm

I believe this with all of my heart. There was a time, many years ago, when everything seemed as dark as it could get. My son was sick, I had a 2nd trimester miscarriage, my husband had to leave the country for work we were so broke after losing our home and both of our jobs...it was so tough to keep my chin up. I started writing daily about gratitude, and all I was grateful for in a blog. It changed my entire outlook and I don't think I've ever looked back. Hard times still come, but I have a completely different attitude about ALL of it. I love some of your ideas here, and that this doesn't have to be rocket science. Great Blog girlfriend!

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Hilary
10/18/2015 07:57:18 pm

Thanks for this! Yes, learning (and for me, it's always learning!) about gratitude, and keeping it close to your heart, is a win-win situation all around. :)

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Kari
10/18/2015 11:04:31 pm

Hillary,

You really are an awesome and eloquent writer. I am grateful for you. I remember I used to always say I am blessed. But I have changed that to I am thankful and grateful, and to me it certainly seems more humbling. But I certainly love this journal idea too. Thanks

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Hilary
10/19/2015 06:05:27 am

There have been times in my life when I've felt anything but grateful. The journal really is a tool that helps me navigate both the good and bad times. I, too, am grateful for your friendship! :)

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Jerry Lazar link
10/19/2015 09:39:18 am

I once not only had the idea of keeping an "Attitude of Gratitude" Journal -- in conjunction with my then-young kids, to role-model one of those big important "life lessons" -- but also thought there might be a good book idea there. Turns out I was right -- and a quick Amazon search revealed that many others had beat me to it. Accentuating the positive, I guess I was grateful that at least my idea had been validated, and that somebody somewhere was benefiting if not profiting from it... Most recently, former Parade editor Janice Kaplan produced The Gratitude Diaries: How a Year Looking on the Bright Side Can Transform Your Life, which incorporates self-help advice (to improve your life at home and at work) from psychologists, academics, doctors, and philosophers — and even celebs such as Matt Damon and Jerry Seinfeld. Check it out here:
http://amzn.com/0525955062

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Hilary
10/19/2015 03:24:35 pm

Well, your comment is definitely an LOL for me, because over the years, so many of my ideas have been a day behind as well. Of course, Kaplan has the name and credentials and contacts to get this sort of book published, so bravo to her! One of my favorite books that accentuates the positive is Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy. It was published in 1995 and given to me when I was still desperately trying to get pregnant. I still read it now and again for inspiration. :)

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K Kavich
10/20/2015 08:59:36 am

Been doing this for years! Love it!

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Hilary
10/20/2015 01:26:54 pm

Yup, it works. It really, really works. : )

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leslie spoon
10/20/2015 09:25:22 am

Hilary I will try to write a gratitude journal. Maybe that will help my attitude. Everything seems to get to me these days.

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Hilary
10/20/2015 01:28:42 pm

I think that's a great idea. Once you start one--and pick out a pretty notebook that you'll WANT to write in--the most important thing is consistency. :)

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Cindy
10/20/2015 09:50:00 pm

I'm going to do this today : ) Thanks Hilary. Interesting link too.

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Hilary
10/20/2015 10:27:46 pm

Be consistent, and see what happens!
Today, I watched in wonder as two Monarch butterflies frolicked together just a few feet from me. That one is going in MY book tonight. :)

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Tammy Dalcin
10/29/2015 02:39:08 pm

Where do I begin, I am grateful for so many things. My family, job, the wonderful town that I was born and raised in and still live in. My friends, near and far. Little things we all take for granted like hot showers flushing toilets, a reliable car! Last but not least I am grateful for my loving pets, three dogs and a cat. They remind me every day to greet people with a smile and just be happy because life's to short to hold grudges. Besides it's harder to frown (takes more facial muscles) than to smile! Hilary I love your idea of the journal. I might start doing that as well.😊

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Hilary
10/29/2015 03:34:21 pm

Yes, all too often we take the smallest, everyday occurrences in life--things that we are soooo fortunate to have--for granted. The journal reminds me of these blessings every single day! :)

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Kim
11/1/2015 12:59:53 pm

Gratitude is something near and dear to my heart. Losing my parents makes me appreciate time in a million different ways. Gratitude is the first sentiment I go to in the hardest of times..."ok.ok.ok. (start to audibly breathe deeply)... What am I thankful for?" And I start listing everything I can think of. Thanks for the blog post!

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Hilary
11/1/2015 01:23:25 pm

Despite the crappy times all of us have from time to time, there is, also, ALWAYS much to be thankful for. Thank you for expressing this! xo

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kerri
11/1/2015 07:44:51 pm

Boy am I grateful. For my friends, mostly. For opportunity and good luck, which seems to always be there every time I feel like giving up. For family- even though sometimes.... :) but I really do love them.

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Hilary
11/1/2015 08:14:37 pm

There is so much to be grateful for. We only have to look around to see it! :)

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Susan Jordan
11/9/2015 10:18:07 pm

Hmmm. Maybe I'll do this tomorrow, just to see what happens.

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Hilary
11/10/2015 03:40:35 pm

One day will likely not do the trick. Two weeks, minimum! :)

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    Hilary Roberts Grant

    Journalist, editor, filmmaker, foodie--and a clown! 
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